Echoes of the Past [Iliana] (closed)

[Nathaniel Wright]

Nathaniel was walking through the courtyard, seeming a bit lost in thought at the moment, not a common expression for the prefect. He stopped only when he managed to actually walk into a bush from turning a corner too soon. He glanced around and cleared his throat, straightening his cloak. He sighed a bit to himself before looking around in a more discerning fashion, trying to make sense of where he'd walked to.

He'd been lost in his thoughts concerning the fact this was his final year here at Hogwarts. He wasn't sure how he felt about that fact at the moment and it had caused the temporary lack of concentration from the usual bulwark that was Nathaniel. He set his bag down for a moment, letting it hit the bench near him with a thump, but he himself didn't sit down. Instead, in another slightly uncharacteristic moment (as he thought the courtyard was clear enough of people for him to be unnoticed), he began to pace.

He felt like there were things he'd left... unfinished. Things that had ended, but hadn't been resolved. There was still more he needed to do, but how could he manage it in the remaining time? He crossed one arm across his chest, lifting the other hand to his chin, the fingers of that hand covering his mouth partially as he paced back and forth, a slow but tense circle in front of the bench. If anyone were to approach, he might not realize it as his eyes got a sort of glossy look to them as he started to get lost again.

There were few times he'd ever done this publicly. He preferred the concepts people came up with about him because it meant most of them left him alone. In fact, he probably hadn't done this out of his room in about two years...

[Iliana Tsankova]

She’d finished up her work and didn’t have any students to tutor so for once Ili had free time. Rather than rush off to her place and unwind she didn’t see the point so she made her way to the courtyard to just sort of let her mind clear from the day. As soon as she got near the space though she immediately realized she wasn’t the only one to have such a thought and she almost turned around. But instead she peeked around the corner and as soon as she spotted the figure she decided going back to her dorm room wasn’t where she was going.

Leaning against one of the archway doors she watched him as he paced it wasn’t uncommon for Nathaniel but it was uncommon he was doing it in such a public place. He was completely lost in his thoughts and Ili took her time approaching him, doing her level best not to make a sound and settling herself on the bench where he paced. Crossing her legs she folded her hands in her lap and watched him for another quiet moment before she finally smiled, “Penny for your thoughts, Nate?” Iliana had thought long and hard before she used that specific shortening of his name.

She knew well enough only a very select few were allowed to do so and she’d never abused the privilege least of all around others. She smiled when he looked at her and head tilted some resting her chin on the back of her hand, “You were so lost in thought you didn’t even notice me wandering over here and sitting down.” Adjusting her robes absently to smooth out a wrinkle or two she focused her attention back on him entirely, sure they’d been broken up for a while but that didn’t mean she hated him or wished bad things for him. They’d just been incompatible and been smart enough to realize it before they’d continued on too much longer, her Uncle and Aunt had pointed out it was very mature of both of them at the time.

[Nathaniel Wright]

Nathaniel really had not noticed her approach at all and when she spoke, he jumped so hard he nearly toppled over and gripped his chest, turning towards her, "Bloody hell, Ili," he breathed, his eyebrow twitching a bit in his irritation at being caught so off guard but within a moment, he'd composed himself and crossed his arms.

"So it would seem," he said to her comment, "It's nothing important," he shook his head, though she'd know anything that got him that distracted in public was something weighing heavily on him, but he was choosing to not discuss it either because they were still in an open area or because he was choosing not to "burden her" with that information.

He also had not and would not wish anything bad for her and honestly was content with just a friendship. Though, friendship for him usually meant something akin to a guard dog/private detective in your back pocket. While he hadn't heard anything about an official relationship between Ili and Yuriy, the fact she'd spent time alone with him to tutor him was enough to make sure that Yuriy wasn't a sketch character. Not because he didn't want Ili to have other relationships, but because he wanted to make sure she wouldn't get hurt. Though he knew well enough rumors and word of mouth were only so effective in showing a person's real character.

"What brings you to the gardens?" he asked, clearly trying to shift the conversation away from himself.

[Iliana Tsankova]

She giggled at his reaction and just raised a brow at him when he redirected the question back to her more or less. “Just free time is all but you aren’t getting out of answering me that easily…” Leaning back against the bench she folded her arms over her chest and watched him. He wouldn’t have been nearly so distracted if it was a problem with an easy solution and she just stared at him for a few moments longer before she recalled only one other problem that would have him so wired.

Ili leaned forward resting her elbows on her knee and lowered her voice, “It hasn’t gotten worse... Has it Nate?” She wasn’t going to get any more specific than that but she made sure it was relatively clear what she was speaking about by the concerned look on her face. Just because they weren’t together anymore didn’t mean she cared any less about his problems, they were still friends or at least she thought so. Ili did at least humor him a bit, hoping if she told him something that was bothering her he’d at the very least recognize she was willing to share and listen still.

“Still trying to wrap my head around being tutored instead of tutoring myself… but if I want to pass my NEWTs I’ve no other choice at least in Astronomy.” He was sure to be amused by that given how often she was the one tutoring everyone else. She wasn’t ashamed of it though, if anything she recognized that it was honest of her to admit to needing the help and she already kept so many things quiet.

[Nathaniel Wright]

Nate shuffled his stance a little at her question. "It's... It's not that," he murmured, rubbing the back of his head. "Not exactly, anyways," he glanced around again, ensuring no one was nearby.

Hearing her talking about needing tutoring to pass her NEWTs, he gave a nod, "I get that," he murmured, "I think that test is what's got me... thinking," he shifted to sit on the bench as well, moving his bag that he'd dropped onto it before he started to pace.

"What will you do after this?" he asked, glancing at her. He legitimately asked but also hinted at what was bothering him. With the two comments, she might piece together that he was worried about his father's behavior after graduating. "I honestly have no idea right now. I used to know, but..." he shrugged, rubbing his forehead.

[Iliana Tsankova]

She mentally sighed when he said it wasn't what she thought and mentioned the test actually being the culprit of his worried pacing. It took everything she had not to smile when he settled down on the bench next to her, not wanting to look too pleased that her presence seemed to settle him down some. At his question Ili looked a little confused before it clicked what he was asking, "Oh, you know... I haven't really thought about it too much yet. My Uncle says whatever I choose is fine with him but nothing has really called to me yet."

She'd been thinking about it too but it wasn't like she would be homeless or lacking funds, her Aunt and Uncle had been minding her inheritance from her parents since they passed. Money wasn't going to be an object for her in that regard but she knew that wasn't how it worked for everyone. His comment about second guessing his future plans brought a brow to raise, "What brought on the change of heart? I thought you were pretty well decided years ago."

[Nathaniel Wright]

"Rachel... and Olly," Nate murmured, taking a deep breath, "Lucy avoids his attention altogether, but those two would be next on his chopping block," he looked at his hands, leaning on his knees, "I've always managed to be the one he always turned on, turned to when he..." he took a deep breath, "They're not even aware of it. I don't want them to know, but if I leave to go study to go down the path I had set..." he rubbed his forehead.

"I only thought about it recently because..." he took a deep breath, "I just saw some of the old scars from when I was about Olly's age," he murmured, "I can't leave them there. I don't know what that will mean for everything else, but I can't handle that idea," he sat back on the bench.

[Iliana Tsankova]

Iliana’s expression softened as she listened, her heart twisting at the weight in Nathaniel’s voice. She shifted slightly on the bench, her fingers curling together in her lap as she considered her words. “Nate…” she started, her voice quieter now, thoughtful. “You shouldn’t have had to carry that alone.”

Her gaze flickered to his hands, the tension in his posture, the way he was bracing himself. She wanted to reach out but hesitated, unsure if he would welcome the comfort or if it would only make things harder to say. Instead, she exhaled slowly.

“I get it,” she admitted. “Maybe not in the same way, but… I understand why you feel like you can’t just walk away. You’ve been the one to take it, to shield them from it, and now you’re scared of what happens if you’re not there.”

She let the words settle between them before glancing over at him, her brow furrowing slightly. “But you don’t have to figure this out alone. Whatever you decide to do, you have people who care about you. I care.”

Iliana bit the inside of her cheek, debating whether she should say more, but she settled on something simple. “So… what now? If staying is what you need to do, what does that look like?”

[Nathaniel Wright]

Nate listened as she spoke to him, looking at his hands, "I don't know... I'd say I'd follow in my father's footsteps. However, even that would still require me to have to leave to go study," he said, shaking his head, "If I could somehow get them out of there, I'd take the chance. Still, there's so few people that are willing to risk my father's ire or my uncle's.... they've put themselves in the perfect spots to be untouchable," he grit his teeth, "And if I take them away from there, I'd have to explain to them why."

He rubbed at his jaw, looking like he needed to shave a bit, further proof of how much this was bothering him, "I just feel stuck," he sighed heavily.

[Iliana Tsankova]

Iliana watched him closely as he spoke, her expression unreadable at first but not because she didn’t care. Quite the opposite. As anyone who knew her would see she was trying to think, to solve, in that fiercely quiet way of hers that came out when someone she cared about was hurting. “I hate that you feel like this is on your shoulders alone,” she said finally, her voice low but firm. “That they’ve backed you into a corner where every choice feels like a dead-end.” Her gaze dropped briefly to his hands again, then back up to his face when that knowing light seemed to shine in her eyes. “What if there was another way?”

She hesitated for a beat, then added, “I have a thought…" Pausing she gathered her thoughts again before she continued, "There are programs; international honors, exchanges for matters of distinction, that kind of thing. Rachel’s marks are strong, right? And Olly’s brilliant in his own way. What if we found a way to get them into something prestigious enough to raise eyebrows but give them distance? Beauxbatons has hosted exceptional students before. Ilvermorny too. I have a few contacts I could inquire of, quietly of course.” Her Aunt was still very highly regarded at her former school and of course her Uncle did plenty of business in America so surely he would know someone to speak with about their schools programs.

Giving a small shrug, she kept her eyes locked on his. “It wouldn’t require running or hiding. It’d be giving them something your uncle and your father can’t touch. A future of their own. And it might give you the space to breathe. To think about your future without the constant threat of what might happen if you look away for five minutes.” Iliana leaned back just slightly, her voice softening again. “You don’t have to say yes. You don’t have to decide right now. But if it’s something you want to explore… I’ll find out what I can. No strings.” Her lips curled on the edges faintly, but the warmth in her expression didn’t falter. “Whatever you choose, Nate…I’ll help however I can.”

[Nathaniel Wright]

Nate gave a grunt of sorts to her initial comment about everything being a dead-end, but as she began to spin some ideas, he looked up at her, giving her his full attention as he usually did. More so now because she was giving some excellent options on how to get Rachel and Olly out from under his father. He looked towards the path, squinting like he was looking at something small there, but it was a look he got when he was also trying to move the pieces around in his head.

More than for him, they really were good opportunities for them both. They would flourish out from under their father, and his mother wouldn't be hard to convince. She was as stuck as they were. She had already done her best to keep Lucy out of his attention, and she could probably send her away to family. And he'd have nothing to complain about. In fact, he'd find a way to praise himself for it.

"Are you sure?" Nate looked at her, "I feel like I'd be asking a lot if I asked you to look into it." he ran a hand through his hair before looking over his shoulder as he heard Rachel calling, having spotted them from across the way. He waved back to her, and Olly, seeing that, per the norm, he wasn't far away from his sister. They were different years, but the three were all in the same house. There wasn't much escaping each other anyway, "It's almost too perfect of a solution." he mumbled.

[Iliana Tsankova]

Ili shook her head instantly, "It's not too much. I don't want to see you destroy yourself or give up on your dreams just because well, you know…" She didn't want to say it outloud, Hogwarts walls had many ears and the less said outwardly the better honestly. She nodded absently, "If it works. I can't promise my sources will come through but I can ask, it's the least I can do to help."

Spotting his siblings she gave a little wave of her own knowing the pair well enough that it would be rude if she didn't acknowledge them. Pushing from her seat on the bench she adjusted her robes and sighed softly, "I'll find out what I can over winter break and I'll let you know soon as we're all back, alright?" Ili hoped that would be quick enough to help give him some breathing room, he had to focus on his studies and his NEWTs coming up. All the 7th years did, which was why she was still receiving tutoring with the subjects she struggled to get a comfortable grasp on.

Flashing him a soft smile she felt like more than anyone else was reserved just for him she motioned towards them, "You'd probably better go check in with them. I've got to go study some more before my next class anyway." Moving a little closer to him she gave his upper arm a gentle squeeze before she moved past him, "We'll talk again soon, Nate. Promise."

[Nathaniel Wright]

Nate looked at her as she stood, not having expected her to rise, though Rachel had waved much more enthusiastically when she'd seen her, "Just don't... worry too much about it. If something comes of it great, if it not... I'll figure something out. I always do," he muttered.

When she told him to go check on them, he nodded, but looked at her again as she squeezed his arm, "Of course," he murmured, giving a small smile, an expression that rarely ever graced his face either, before he stood. He picked up his bag as she walked away towards wherever she was going to study, looking after her for a moment, something else seeming to have gotten into his mind. He then turned and walked towards where his younger siblings were waiting.

"Awww, is Ili leaving already?" Rachel whined, "I feel like it's been forever since I got to talk to her!" she sighed.

"It's because you're a pipsqueak," Nate said, lightly pushing on her forehead, making her laugh, "C'mon. You're going to be late and I'm not vouching for you," he said as he starting walking towards the building again.

"You never do," Olly said with a whine, hurrying to keep up with them both.